Archive for November, 2007


I worked retail for many, many years.  Most of the time I really enjoyed it. I’m good with the B. S.  and have a talent for merchandising.  Shoes to  kitchenware to fabric.

The holidays, however were a completely different  tune.  I became burnt and more than a little humbug about them.  To be honest, my retail  friends and I would greet each other during the holidays with, “And a Bah FUCKING Humbug to you too!”  It was bad.

Thank goodness for twinkling holiday lights.  The blue ones especially calm my inner humbug.  If I don’t hear too much holiday music  I get pretty close to having actual holiday cheer.

Things have gotten much better in the last few years.  Every other year my family gets gifts from me.  Wait, wait, on the, “other,” years I do a charity gift on our behalf.   Last year we bought a llama for a family in a developing country.  I made everyone llama ornaments for their trees.  This year I get to go shopping and creating again.  The odd thing is I’m actually in the mood.  The Holiday Spirit.

Neil has the Holiday Spirit as well.  Over at Citizen of the Month he’s hosting an online Arts and Crafts Festival.   You should go.

I’m seriously considering putting up my tinsel tree this year.  Maybe on Saturday.  It’s supposed to SNOW, and that always says Holiday Spirit.

Check back Monday for details on my Public Radio debut……….


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I have spent most of this morning getting things uploaded to my Etsy shop. I’m having fun! Here’s the thing I still can’t figure out. How does one pronounce Etsy if you want to use it in conversation? Is it like the name Betsy without a B? I keep saying in my head, EEEtsy, with a long E sound. I don’t know why.

Here is an early morning picture that came out all goth and eery. In all actuality, the sunlight through the frost was brilliant and prismatic.


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If it’s not my organized chaos, it has to be perfect. If it’s perfect, I don’t want to mess it up. It’s really best for me to maintain a certain level of constant near chaos. It’s really just cluttered looking organization. Mess with it and I am lost. LOST. With capital letters and whining.

I spent the last day or so cleaning in that ever so popular OCD/ADHD manner. You know where you have really good intentions of putting everything in it’s place. So I start in one corner and find a hair binder that should live in the bathroom. On my way to return it to it’s rightful home, I am distracted by a piece of fabric that should go back to the studio. I’ll save time and pick that up too, since the studio is right off the bathroom. But, now I’ve walked right past the bathroom, and I’ve deposited the hair binder on my sewing table because the piece of fabric I have brought back to the studio coordinates well with something on the ironing board. I never noticed how nice they look together. That would look good with that yellow piece I used in that other thing. Where did I put that? It’s 10 minutes later, I’ve got a nice color combo going for yet another project, and now I can’t find the hair binder. It’s amazing that I actually got my place presentable enough to have a guest. I will tell you more about the guest on Monday.

Right now I need to sew some to save the sanity. Tonight I will be attempting to put some items in my new etsy shop. Neil is hosting an Arts and Crafts thingy next week. I need to get moving!

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Sometimes you get what you ask for.  Even when it’s not necessarily what you thought you meant.  I wanted permission from the universe to be done with something.  I said I would need a significant sign that I’m headed in the right direction to continue.  S.F.D.  I know it’s all good, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t hard.

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This weekend is the apex of the Leonid meteor shower.  There’s a field approach off a certain county road.  A friend and I went every year, and we saw some amazing stuff! I can still see the green tail, almost comet like,  that swept all the way across the sky before it disappeared.   We saw 30 some shooting stars that night.

My plan is to go again tonight. If he shows up too, well I guess he shows up too.

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detail of the memorial project

So, this blog is my safe place where I can whine about things I try to stay upbeat about on my other blog. Ok, not so much upbeat, as much as I just don’t like to express how utterly sad and overwhelmed I get about the war, and the project I have undertaken. My mom reads the other blog, and she would worry too much if she knew how negatively this affects me sometimes. My other blog is at http://andstillcounting.blogspot.com and chronicles the progress of a fiber art memorial I started last spring.

You can read about the progress of the project (and sign up to help! PLEASE!!) over there. Over here I need to say that there are about 300 completed blocks in my home. Each block represents 213 deaths. That means I have the symbolic representation of 63,900 souls in my living room.

Most of the time I hold up alright with that. I had a big break about it this summer. I cried and cried when I realized how much death this is. We had some talks, those blocks and I. They know that my intentions are honorable and I don’t mean to exploit them. I simply want them to be remembered. I want us to stop and think about what responsibility we have as a nation. As citizens of the world.

But, it is so much. The war debt is up to 1.9 TRILLION dollars. Are there numbers after trillion? ( I know there are, but, for the life of me I don’t want to know how to count that high.) I have reached a saturation point. I can’t listen to the news without having panic attacks. I listen to a story about a soldier who died, and know that he rests on my living room floor. At times I can find comfort in that, but, mostly it makes me sad these days.

I need to be doing more PR for this so that it can get out and be seen now that it is of a significant quantity, but I am so tired of it I can barely talk about it. Every time I decide to pack it all in, something happens from out of nowhere to encourage me, so, it seems like this is something I just need to figure out how to do.

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brunchThe big cold and I slept in this morning. (Unemployment has it’s advantages.) What joy! I slept through the night without any nasty coughing spells where my lungs were nearly redirected to different living quarters!

Since it was really too late to have breakfast after I did some yoga. ( Really, the new me does yoga regularly. ) Ok. I had to make it up ’cause I’ve misplaced the yoga dvd I really like, but I did contortion like exercises for 30, yes, 30 minutes. Then to balance that out I thought I’d have a nice fry up for brunch.

I’ve had a package of bacon in the freezer for almost 3 weeks. That’s 3 weeks of bacon calling my name. I’m only so strong. So I cooked it up crispy, and made some garden eggs to go along with it. I ‘m pretending that the flax seeds I sprinkled on top of the eggs will balance out the bacon. I had yogurt, and a real live garden tomato from my friend Sue as well. It looked nice on my thrifted restaurant dishes, so I took a picture for you.

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