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Archive for February, 2009

nearby

you know how sometimes nothing is really wrong, but nothing is really right, and you know you’re supposed to be figuring out the answer to one of those really big life questions, and sometimes, you come up with an answer, but it’s realllly hard to get yourself out of that rut you were in and implement the changes you figured out  and while you’re halfassedly trying to to fool yourself into believing that backward step you took, could, in the right light be construed as a baby step forward, you have a new revelation, and that one totally makes everything else make sense, but, it happens while you’re driving and, you couldn’twrite it down or tell anyone, and now it’s like a dream – peripherally, you catch a glimpse of it, but you can’t get a full handed grasp, and you know it was the answer – maybe the answer to everything, and you want it back….

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pink & orange

pink & orange

I so did not want to do what really needed to be done today.  I have huge issues with pr type stuff.  Something about it feels bragadocious and boastful.  I know that it really isn’t, and no one is ever going to know about this war project if I don’t get out and tell them, but it’s really hard.

Somehow when I speak to people about it, it ends up back at me and “what an awe inspiring idea”  I had, and it feels too much about me, and it’s not supposed to be about me.  The whole rest of my life is selfishly about me.

Instead of whining, I’ll post some photos of someone elses charity project that I maniacally worked on instead of my own.

project improv block

another project improv block

another project improv block

project improv block

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